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murphzlaw1

Okay...so...quitting Smokin.

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I wanted to check in with you all.

Things haven't been going especially well, to be quite honest.

While of course i don't want to get into too many specifics, suffice it to say that it's been an extremely rough time for the kids and me.

I'm still pretty absent from the forum these days. I check in occasionally, in case there is something that needs immediate attention. But really, my mind is elsewhere, and I can't devote the time here that I usually do.

Hopefully as things calm down and life begins to resemble some sort of normalcy, I'll return full on, but for now, it's just not the best time.

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Don't worry about us - take care of yourself and your kids. You and they are the priority. Ed and Mark can take the wheelhouse for a while. This isn't Deadliest Catch, and they sure drive better than the guy on Elliot's ship that ran them into the ice floes on the episode that aired last week. (whoops!).

Keeping good thoughts for all y'all.

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I wanted to check in with you all.

Things haven't been going especially well, to be quite honest.

While of course i don't want to get into too many specifics, suffice it to say that it's been an extremely rough time for the kids and me.

Take care of the home front, my friend.

"Us troublemakers" will try to be on our best behavior (yeah, Right...I hope you can tell the difference!) until you return.

Blessing be with you and with yours,

Hex

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Murph -

As a Dad who's been in a similar situation, right now it's only about the kids. You are absolutely Right in keeping your children as your priority at this point in your "transition". Spend your time with your kids loving and caring for them...that they know "Dad" will always be there for them is ever so important during these rough days. Kids don't rationalize the same way adults do so stability for them as best you can muster is the only important thing.

I don't think there is a person here that doesn't understand where your priorities should be at the moment...frankly I think we'd all be a bit concerned if the forum was your #1 right now. Celebrate your love with your children, LOVE will help them heal more than you'll ever know....until about 10 years from now! Believe me, we know!

Anything that Mark or Ed can't handle, barring complete failure of the forum software, can wait I'm sure.

Our prayers of Healing, Caring and Compassion go out to all of you,

Al & Kay

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Hi Murph;

Handle what needs to be handled at home so that sometime you will have more flexibility to handle things not immediately there.

Your doing that is most needed and wanted for now, Most of us are somewhat cognizant of the rules of this game and people are indeed basically good.

As my parents used to say when the other went to the little house in the back " Take your time going then hurry back". I think most of us will still be here and those who won't won't matter anyways.

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I wanted to check in with you all.

Things haven't been going especially well, to be quite honest.

While of course i don't want to get into too many specifics, suffice it to say that it's been an extremely rough time for the kids and me.

I'm still pretty absent from the forum these days. I check in occasionally, in case there is something that needs immediate attention. But really, my mind is elsewhere, and I can't devote the time here that I usually do.

Hopefully as things calm down and life begins to resemble some sort of normalcy, I'll return full on, but for now, it's just not the best time.

Me too.... :hi:

Good luck and continued perseverance!!!

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I avoided this thread because I was going through some stuff myself and didn't want to be reminded that I needed to stop smoking; like you, every time I set a "time" something big would go down - like my mother died, my fiance had an affair with one of his collegues or my dog died .. the daily pressures of life are enough but when we are blindsided (even if we see it coming, I think there is a blindside element to these huge life changes) it can seem enough to paralyze us

I am so sorry to hear what you and your family are going through. in a time of such upheaval its hard to remember that you will indeed regain equilibrium and all will be well again, just different. I wish I had some great words of advice for you and the children, but I don't only these, listen, love and support each other and remind one another that better days are ahead

take really good care of yourself, hell, have a few cigarettes if you need to and remember, you did it, and you will do it again

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One day at a time. One foot in front of the other. Even if you don't want to.

I tell myself that dozens of times a day....... Thanks, Bro K!

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Really wish I had something of an update to give you guys.

I'm maintaining. What can I say?

I've set a "tentative" goal of stopping again, come the first of the year. That's when all the cool kids do it, right?

That's the smoking thing.

The home life thing...well. It is what it is. I guess I'm adapting, at least sorta well. We're still friendly, which is a plus.

I may have an opportunity to change my work schedule here in a few weeks, so that's something new. Basically, 2 days on 2nd shift, 2 days on 3rd shift, and 3 days off a week. it's better for family time, you know?

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Really wish I had something of an update to give you guys.

Wish granted.
I'm maintaining. What can I say?

I've set a "tentative" goal of stopping again, come the first of the year. That's when all the cool kids do it, right?

That's the smoking thing.

The home life thing...well. It is what it is. I guess I'm adapting, at least sorta well. We're still friendly, which is a plus.

I may have an opportunity to change my work schedule here in a few weeks, so that's something new. Basically, 2 days on 2nd shift, 2 days on 3rd shift, and 3 days off a week. it's better for family time, you know?

So things have not spiraled completely out of control... not on trial for matricide, kids have not run away to join circuses, and you still like yourself enough to want to improve yourself. That is good to hear.

Is your "tentative" plan to use the same basic approach to quitting?

Edited by mererdog

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Really wish I had something of an update to give you guys.

I'm maintaining. What can I say?

I've set a "tentative" goal of stopping again, come the first of the year. That's when all the cool kids do it, right?

That's the smoking thing.

The home life thing...well. It is what it is. I guess I'm adapting, at least sorta well. We're still friendly, which is a plus.

I may have an opportunity to change my work schedule here in a few weeks, so that's something new. Basically, 2 days on 2nd shift, 2 days on 3rd shift, and 3 days off a week. it's better for family time, you know?

actually murph,pick a day that has special meaning to you,and then decide if you want to stop,i got pissed at obama,so 4 years ago,i stopped.however,there hasn't been a day go by where i haven't questioned that decision.

i can only hope that things get better at home for you.

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The best day to quit smoking is the day you quit smoking. Just don't beat yourself up if you fail. Keep at it and one day it will happen. I continue to hold you close in my thoughts and meditations and I know that you will succeed.

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Is your "tentative" plan to use the same basic approach to quitting?

Mm. Basically. It DID work. If things hadn't happened as they did, I probably would have succeeded in my quit smoking goal.

I admit I feel a little guilty when I light up a cigarette.

I guess I need to get back to a point where I like myself enough to try again. So what I'm doing NOW is a) trying to slow down and b) trying to prepare my mind for it again.

Oh. I will probably not hit the "new year's eve" mark. It will be late on new year's day. that's what I'm going for.

Cuz I know New Year's Eve will be a very difficult time to quit.

(if all goes to plan :devil:)

Guys, I really do appreciate all of the support you've shown me through this whole ordeal. I didn't really expect any of this. I started this post, basically as a little blog of my own, to track my progress, my ups and downs. I didn't expect anyone else to jump in.

From the first day, (before day 1 of my original quit), thru to 8 months, to the separation...you guys overwhelm me with support.

I don't honestly think I've ever had that kind of support before. I'm humbled.

Thank you.

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~ Whether ya like it or not, we're like sticky snot... :dirol:

You are stronger than you believe. You can achieve! :friends:

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Mm. Basically. It DID work. If things hadn't happened as they did, I probably would have succeeded in my quit smoking goal.

I admit I feel a little guilty when I light up a cigarette.

I guess I need to get back to a point where I like myself enough to try again. So what I'm doing NOW is a) trying to slow down and b) trying to prepare my mind for it again.

Oh. I will probably not hit the "new year's eve" mark. It will be late on new year's day. that's what I'm going for.

Cuz I know New Year's Eve will be a very difficult time to quit.

(if all goes to plan :devil:)

Guys, I really do appreciate all of the support you've shown me through this whole ordeal. I didn't really expect any of this. I started this post, basically as a little blog of my own, to track my progress, my ups and downs. I didn't expect anyone else to jump in.

From the first day, (before day 1 of my original quit), thru to 8 months, to the separation...you guys overwhelm me with support.

I don't honestly think I've ever had that kind of support before. I'm humbled.

Thank you.

Light a mouse and you will feel even worse.

Edited by BpCorey

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