Please pray for me, for uncommon favor, divine intervention and prosperity.
This is the first time I am opening up to anyone, I just need peace in my life, I need direction .
At age 6, my church friend and I would run an hide in the toilet from a grown man that has always twisted our ears or pinched our cheeks till we cried, till one day he never backed down from locating us, he bust open the cubicle door and he began touching my friend and I.
Being that young, we knew nothing about it being wrong.
Fast forward through my life, I have trouble in my relationships with woman, nothing ever lasted, I was always the one who dated someone that was unfaithful.
My parents being divorced has had an effect on my life , that I suppressed everything to be the pillar of strength for my younger sibling who was emotional every day of her schooling career.
I have attempted giving up on life due to the numerous triggers I had of that episode , I resorted to Alcohol an Cannabis to suppress my thoughts of the same-sex.
I hated my life, I had several failed attempts.
Testing my sibling on the school work to ensure they performed well, resulted in me being forced to finish school, I passed with basics.
During my college years I had an awful re-trigger, a driver that worked for my father , were taking me to college daily, until one day I noticed he stank of cannabis, before I jumped of the vehicle, he touched me.
I froze an was blank, I walked out with a feeling of void an emptiness, as I crossed a 4-lane street to my college, It was scorching hot, I had not eaten, I pulled an all nighter for my examination, which I forgotten as I stood outside , I decided to walk a bit and this day changed my life.
I came under a dizzy spell an collapsed face first onto broken concrete, at the age of 21 , I had lost several teeth, suffered a broken nose(which tore away from my face), my upper lip completely hanging, fractured lower an upper jaw.
Through my parents constant prayers while I was in the operating room, I was not required any plating to hold my jaws together.
As the years went on, I had several heartbreaks, to the extent that I was told by a prophet that I carry a generational curse of the males in the family that would not marry.
Up till today, being 30, I have no thoughts of marriage, yes the thought of having a family exists, but only once I succeed in life, so I can support them an give them the best.
I was blessed to be selected to do an apprenticeship with an automotive company, I qualified(as I was not able to complete my college modules due to contract terms of an apprenticeship)
I’m just in need of guidance, I have lost touch in religion, pastors an prophets even picked up that I have no interest in marriage.
I really want to leave my country an prosper in another country, currently praying for sponsors.
I love my siblings, but we have such a tough love, it hurts to even hug them, being their only brother, I get a one handed hug. Its heartbreaking.
They both are really qualified, thriving really well in life, but has left me to care for my parents with my minimum wage. Hence why im still residing in my parents home at the age of 30(one of the factors that woman I have dated, disliked that I never had a place of my own)
I need prayer, hope an faith to go on.
currently fasting to be accepted into University of SA , for prosperity, guidance, success and uncommon favor.