You Know You Are Getting Dumber When


BpCorey
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~ Granbabe teaching you to use her 'Leap Frog' & she says, "It's OK Gramma, I know you're old!"

Oh! & when ya can't find your post-it notes. Totally lost!

... They're right where ya left 'em... by your glasses... after ya left a post-it to remind ya... on the mirror... above your glasses...

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I love when servers at work do a beverage pass with a pot of coffee in one hand, a pitcher of juice in the other and proceed to pour hot coffee in a glass and juice in a coffee cup. Usually they figure it out when the resident looks at them and asks "which one of us has the mental problem?"

I also love "ask the obvious" questions, like when someone orders toast and the very next question is "toasted?" Or one orders a steak, cooked well done and hears "how would you like that cooked?" I love ordering a burger and fries and being asked if I would like fries with that. I usually reply "The one I ordered should be enough, thanks." I usually get a glazed over look from the order taker, and a snicker from the manager.

Today was a special moment for stupid: I saw a resident order some ice cream, to which the server replied "how would you like it cooked?" The resident was on the ball and politely replied, "frozen and in a dish would be best, I would think." I managed to get through the door to my unit before I busted up laughing.

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I love the restaurants where I order club soda, and during the meal some one either fills it with water or regular soda. which is bad when you are diabetic. once I ate a pepper and had to take a chug of soda water, which was refilled with real soda.

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I love when servers at work do a beverage pass with a pot of coffee in one hand, a pitcher of juice in the other and proceed to pour hot coffee in a glass and juice in a coffee cup. Usually they figure it out when the resident looks at them and asks "which one of us has the mental problem?"

I also love "ask the obvious" questions, like when someone orders toast and the very next question is "toasted?" Or one orders a steak, cooked well done and hears "how would you like that cooked?" I love ordering a burger and fries and being asked if I would like fries with that. I usually reply "The one I ordered should be enough, thanks." I usually get a glazed over look from the order taker, and a snicker from the manager.

Today was a special moment for stupid: I saw a resident order some ice cream, to which the server replied "how would you like it cooked?" The resident was on the ball and politely replied, "frozen and in a dish would be best, I would think." I managed to get through the door to my unit before I busted up laughing.

Nice!

Reminds me of when I ordered a mushroom curry from the vegetarian side of the menu, and was asked if I wanted it 'on or off the bone'.

To be fair, there were two waiters there, and the second one did the most enormous double take I've ever witnessed.

It robbed me of the chance to say 'if you can find a bone in there, the deal's off' - plus I didn't think of that till later.

With a little reworking you can make a nice haiku out of this one.

:)

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~ I work retail... Really, humans 'skip the groove' sooo often :rolleyes:

I realise there are a variety of reasons why someone wouldn't notice the 6 aisles of shoes they're standing in front of when they ask me where the shoes are,

or when a gentleman asks me to find a bra & panties for his wife who's not there & he doesn't know her size.

{ Usually she's about his size, makes it easier... ;) }

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A young bookseller here has just published a collection of Stupid Things People Say In Bookshops. It's brilliant.

I've also worked in retail, and in a lending library, so I'm enjoying the opportunity to categorise:

There's the 'Hi, I'm your new boss':

Is it alright if Ieave my toddlers here while I go to the supermarket?

The 'helpful':

No I can't remember what it's called, or who wrote it, or who the publisher is, or what it's about. It's got a green cover. Or maybe it's more blue... And it's very good.

The snarky:

Customer: Where can I find [the novel] 'A Woman's Guide to Adultery'

Assistant: Teach-Yourself books are on the second floor, madam.

The L1 interference (Non-Brit readers should imagine the first speaker as talking like Prince Charles:

Customer in Travel section: 'Have you got George Orwell's Dining Out in Paris and London?'

Assistant: 'That's Down and Out in Paris and London, sir. You'll find it In the Literature section on your right.'

Customer (annoyed): 'No, no. It's Dining Out in Paris and London. It should be here'

Poor George seems to get them... The Plain Misguided:

'Have you got 1986 by George Orwell?

'It's 1984, and yes, we've got it over there.'

'No, it's definitely 1986. I always remember it, cos that's the year I was born.

And finally the 'do you have any idea what you just did?'

Customer who has spent the last 2 hours picking assistant's well-stocked brain about books, authors, ISBNs, editions, bindings and etc (pocketing his copious notes): Well, thank you for that. I'll get it on Amazon and save a couple of quid. Bye.

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