Thankful


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Due to a calamity of what some might call “errors”, but I'm more inclined to believe were a necessary direction of thought, I've rediscovered a few things lately. Some are merely forum insights, others are more along the lines of general knowledge and a few are nothing short of a break through in Self evaluation.

It's all as it should be according to some particular trains of thought.

It has been very calming to know that there are many good folks here that I can truly call “friends”. Many of you have helped me personally through listening to Life's woes, others have also helped the Membership by directing the theology that is expressed here and others have certainly expressed themselves in a personal, heartfelt manner on subjects of importance to them. All of these factors tell me we have a very dynamic group here.

Recently, Kay and I have been given some rather disturbing news concerning some health issues. I need not go into detail as we are still awaiting final confirmations from our doctors. At this point only miraculous physical changes would change the prognosis. Our prayers have been answered if one result should come back, we are left to wonder if another. But you know what? All is as it should be regardless of the outcome.

Unfortunately, awaiting this sort of information has taken its toll on our emotions and strained usually objective thinking. I have to believe that these last few weeks have all been a part of The Creator's plan for us as well, otherwise I don't think things would have gone as they have.

I guess the good part of all this is that I have been forced to confront things in a manner I normally wouldn't. Sometimes it's difficult to see the truth in one's own Self evaluation, and many times “the truth” is not always what it appears to be at first or on the surface. Circumstances have led me to getting several items out from under the buried clutter of my mind. I'm sure everyone knows what I'm referring to in having experiences from our past that get “buried” and we don't like to, nor want to, deal with those issues.

We all have experiences that come and go that do not constitute more than momentary thought. Other experiences have such great impact we fumble with them for years before being able to make sense of it. The majority of our experiences simply remain available to our conscious thinking as new issues come up, that are similar in some way, reminding us of the others. I don't necessarily like the manner in which a few of these buried issues have resolved themselves lately as it has required seeing a part of Self I'm not fond of.

My wife Kay, having been a friend for 31 years and partner for the past 11, has probably had the most effect on keeping me “grounded” as some say and not falling back into the fellow I once was. I can thank the ULC Church in Modesto for literally being “in my way” one night many years ago as I stumbled home in a drunken stupor. The message on that sign caused the first glances at the need to change. Kay came into my life only a few short years later to keep reminding me of those changes I vowed to keep.

As our separate lives took the twists and turns that were necessary for our individual experiences to come full circle, we found ourselves building a whole new relationship while on Maui. This created what has hence become our experiences. She has recently had to face some ugly truths from her past by being reunited with her sister via the inter-net and cleaned up much of that baggage. My hatred of mean spirited, violent people finally got the boot from my thinking in past few days, quite frankly in the past 24 hours. But those issues have not been the real matter at hand for either of us. These, subconscious landmines, were merely obstacles that had to be overcome before other issues could ever be dealt with in a constructive manner.

In essence, regardless of what we now face together in the realm of physical issues, we are now both free to tackle together without conscious, and better yet, subconscious distraction. Naturally there is little correlation regarding the specific circumstances or experiences, but our being held captive by certain fears and angst about any past issue could have a dramatic affect on our future physical matters.

Being free of all these internal baggage items simply gives us a clean slate and recharged energies to face an uncertain future. We both find it quite amazing how many things of clutter in our minds have all come out in just the past few months and been dealt with in a conclusive manner. Some via the inter-net in forums or groups, some face to face with family members and friends and others in an entirely Spiritual manner.

After a long talk this morning we both made a few phone calls and now we're both addressing our “friends” and acquaintances on forums and we have a couple of letters to write.

Regardless of direct or indirect input, meaningful or distraction confrontations, good, bad or “other” advice or commentary, I/we have to lump it all together as one major Life experience for the betterment of our well being. It doesn't matter if you, the reader, had a personal part in any topic discussion or not or if I/we had direct exchanges or not, by simply being a part of the equation, you helped other Hu-man Beings find a Light at the end of a dark pathway.

So to each and everyone of you, a sincere and heartfelt Thank You!

It would have really have been a boring trip without ya! ;)

Blessings of Peace,

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I will carry both of you into the Medicine Wheel today.

It sounds to me that you have both been enlightened to many lessons. And having learned those lessons you will continue to receive many messages. And as you have shared this message today with all of us, I for one, am very appreciative of your words as they cause me to look at new perspectives from your own vantage points....May the Creator of all that is continue to guide you and direct you both as you walk the sacred path of peace........God's Peace.....To`na Wanagi

Edited by To`na Wanagi
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Atwater Vitki thank you for sharing and bringing your Unique perspectives to us all. You have brought much joy and warmth into my heart through your postings. I have placed a special mineral totem on my sacred altar to channel love and healing energies your way for when I sit before it and meditate.

Edited by Fawzo
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I will carry both of you into the Medicine Wheel today.

It sounds to me that you have both been enlightened to many lessons. And having learned those lessons you will continue to receive many messages. And as you have shared this message today with all of us, I for one, am very appreciative of your words as they cause me to look at new perspectives from your own vantage points....May the Creator of all that is continue to guide you and direct you both as you walk the sacred path of peace........God's Peace.....To`na Wanagi

To'na, Yes indeed. Kay and I both have had a new awareness brought to us through the muddle of so many things happening simultaneously. During a long conversation several months ago, we were amazed at how many difficult situations had been compounded upon us individually and jointly. Family, friends, internet groups, doctors, banks and politicians oh my!

That talk is basically what led to our realizing that immediately freeing our Self of all the negative energy of both the conscious and subconscious realms was the only way we could return our supra-consciousness to where it was when we lived Maui. Our Spirits had been so thoroughly disrupted that something had to give, or quite frankly, I think we would have mentally caved in.

We are both appreciative that you would carry this with you in Walking the Medicine Wheel. Kay has a tiny bit of Black Foot/Crow in her heritage and lineage so she sends a special thanks that you would consider us. Her "Oma", grandmother, was the last to remember the Old Ones and a very few of the old ways of her Native American ancestors, so we understand the privilege by being honored so. When I read this to her last night it made her get the small, beaded, buckskin- Blackfoot Medicine Bag (Oma called it her "trinket bag" for things she kept for the grand daughters as her grandmother did. Kay received it when she passed in 1990) that has been past down since the 1820's to have out as a tutelary omen and connection to your energies there. Kay keeps a piece of fine quartz crystal from her father's land up by Placerville in it now.

I am also pleased that you managed to glean something from my posting this topic. If just one person does so through its content then I have accomplished what I set out to do.

Again, thank you for your kind consideration and honoring us with your Walk. It must have had some effect as I swear, today has greeted us with a whole different energy than any day has in nearly a year.

:) Is there a chance here that you have seen through my shenanigans?

edit: not to say I do not understand what I have done has caused an irreparable rift - but you will never understand exactly how many good things I wish for you...

Brother Sky,

Thank you for acknowledging continuing a positive line of thinking. I'm missing something I'm sure, but I honestly do not understand what you mean by “seeing through your shenanigans” nor how these may apply to Kay and my situation.

I also have the same wish for everyone, and you, that nothing but what is best for folks will materialize for them in whatever manner is best suited. For some that is the mundane things of the physical realms and for others the dynamic things of the ethereal planes. Whichever and however is best suited for their specific need at hand.

I think we would both be doing any honest Belief a grand injustice if we allowed an “irreparable rift” to stand in the way of either of us gaining new insights or understandings. In the context of my post above there were far worse situations than one's had here that managed to be repaired, so I remain hopeful in all relationships, at whatever level they may be, for either us.

May our Creator continue to enlighten our consciousnesses and fill our souls with peace. May His blessings and comfort find you when you need them most. Amen.

Songster,

Thank you for such a kind and thoughtful prayer. I appreciate its meaning for all in many ways. Perhaps we should all read it together as it is meant, I'm certain, for everyone, on or off the topic.

May you continue to spread your valuable words and share your kindred spirit with all who cross your path.

Blessings of Peace to each and every one of you here and throughout the forum.

Al

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Brother Sky,

Thank you for acknowledging continuing a positive line of thinking. I'm missing something I'm sure, but I honestly do not understand what you mean by “seeing through your shenanigans” nor how these may apply to Kay and my situation.

I also have the same wish for everyone, and you, that nothing but what is best for folks will materialize for them in whatever manner is best suited. For some that is the mundane things of the physical realms and for others the dynamic things of the ethereal planes. Whichever and however is best suited for their specific need at hand.

I think we would both be doing any honest Belief a grand injustice if we allowed an “irreparable rift” to stand in the way of either of us gaining new insights or understandings. In the context of my post above there were far worse situations than one's had here that managed to be repaired, so I remain hopeful in all relationships, at whatever level they may be, for either us.

I am very stern with myself, and I have been painfully aware of how I have been pushing you.

I think back ten years ago, and I would have had an almost impossible time in forgiving such treatment pointed at myself - and the fact that I can not explain it to you in an understandable manner, only compounds the hurt you must have felt.

You know I have expressed the fact that I believe there has been an association between yourself and myself for a very long time. I fully believe there will come a time when perspective will answer this question for you - it is the only ease my mind has felt for quite a while now.

I am not able, at this time, to devote my energies to assisting in what you are going through ( even should you accept such ) but my prayers for you will not stop, and I should say HAVEN'T stopped - because I never stopped adding you to my prayers... they are heartfelt for you and Kay, and as the situation has changed, I may say so....

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  • 2 weeks later...

You're not leaving us, are you, Al? :fie:

I don't understand most of the situation but I do give my heart for you in prayer.

I'm glad you've made it through all of this; and I'm happy that you've recovered. My mother is currently recovering, herself, so I can relate to that bit.

And yes, everything is as it should be, regardless of the chaos and noise going on on the outside of us.

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No, "Hakira", not at all am I leaving here. I am in need of turning my fullest attention homeward and inward on my wife at present. Something that perhaps should have given greater adherence in the past, even though I in no manner admit to neglect, time has come for Spiritual needs to be given there in her time of need.

Thanks for thinking about us though,

Blessings of Peace,

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