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Posts posted by Phillipe

  1. Dirty dirt has its place, though ... if you just want to fill a hole in the ground, why pay extra for clean dirt?


    Unless of course you're in favor of supporting the local economy by helping pay the salaries of the dirt cleaners.


    One might also consider utilizing a DIY Dirt Cleaning Kit. Or, one could visit where you can buy, sell or give away dirt. A sort of dirty eBay ...

  2. On 4/16/2018 at 6:49 PM, Geordon said:


    The you that you are now (kind meta, don't you agree?) is no longer the you that you were when you had all 10 toes.  Also, the toe that you lost to illness is no longer part of you, so it is NOT you.


    Does that make sense?

    Kinda meta, indeed. I suppose it all depends upon what one considers "me".


    The toe that I lost still has my DNA - does that not make it "me"?

  3. On 4/8/2018 at 1:19 PM, Geordon said:

    Keep in mind that in Zen, there is no "self."  The ego is an illusion that we convince ourselves (yeah, yeah, I know...) is real when in fact there is no one specific central THING that makes you... You.


    For example, take a teacup.  It has a bowl, an inside, an outside, and a bottom.  What what makes it TEACUP?  If we take away any one of the pieces that go into "teacup" the thing is no longer "teacup."  This is the nature of dependent origination.


    Dependent origination recognizes that in order to be something, the whole is only what which it is because of other things.  Take away any one of the parts that go into "the thing" and it is no longer what it was, like peeling an onion.  Keep peeling and eventually you no longer have "an onion" but a collection of pieces.


    Does that make sense?


    Br. Shoshin

    I have nine toes, having lost one to diabetes.


    Am I no longer Me?

  4. 4 hours ago, Jonathan H. B. Lobl said:

    Monkeys that drink antifreeze get no mileage at all.  

    Oh, you'd be surprised ... it keeps them from rusting up and boiling over, and they seem to enjoy the sweet taste.

    18 minutes ago, mererdog said:

    You have to be firm, Phil. Remember that you are in charge, not the monkeys.

    I know, and if they were regular macaques or spider monkeys, that would be true. But these are Finger Monkeys, too cute not to take orders from.

    finger monkey.jpg

  5. On 2/3/2017 at 8:41 PM, Jonathan H. B. Lobl said:

    Buddhism is frequently describe as a practice, like meditation.  No religion there.

    Actually, it is both a philosophy and a religion. The Buddha did discuss metaphysical aspects of reality that are typically associated with religion. While the Buddha stressed this wasn’t as important as the practice, he still mentioned them, and they are a part of Buddhist teachings. The most “religious” aspects of Buddhism are probably the Buddha’s discussions of the afterlife and the various realms of existence.

    You have a church with ordained ministers?  It's a religion.    


    Not necessarily. As the ULC itself has proven over the years, your "church" can be a third-floor walk-up flat in Brooklyn with no heat, and the "ordained minister" can be your dog Spot. No religion there (unless of course you CREATE one to surround Spot).



  6. 20 minutes ago, Jonathan H. B. Lobl said:

    In the follies of my youth, I decided to explore my family religion, which was Judaism.  My closest friends were Hassidic Jews.  I prayed.  I studied.  I believed.  I wound up taking a B.A. in Jewish Studies.  I spent a summer vacation in a Hassidic yeshiva.   Then I came to my senses and woke up.  To be clear, I did not "lose" my faith.  I grew out of it.  I know about faith, from the inside.  I know about prayer.  From the inside.  I look back on this part of my life as youthful stupidity.  It is an understatement to say that I find the memories intensely embarrassing.

    I do not need to engage in prayer, to find out.  Been there.  Done that.  Not gonna do it again.  I have plunged into illusion and emerged out the other side.

    Any questions?


    *raises hand*



    Have you fully explored ALL illusions? Or would that be a waste of your time?

    We're surrounded by illusions. From the moment we wake up we are engulfed in them. Once in a while we believe we can see through them for a moment. But then others take their place.

    Perhaps, too many to explore in one lifetime.

    So you are choosing to ignore them? Based upon your experience? That's certainly one path ...

  7. On 2/20/2017 at 1:42 PM, mererdog said:

    It can open a few doors for you. As long as you arent trying to use it as a qualification for a job, it's fairly unlikely anyone will ask you for specifics and, when people see a title or string of letters attached to your name, they can be more willing to give you a chance to prove yourself. Basically, it allows you to exploit the reflexive deference to authority most people have been raised with.


    Well said.

    Plus, of course, there is the fact of legitimacy within the issuing community.  Just as my doctorate from NYU is accepted by them and their fellow "accredited" schools, and by the companies and institutions that buy into that accreditation, so too is my doctorate and ministerial title from ULC accepted within THIS community and all who accept the legitimacy of the titles in the world.

    • Like 1
  8. 21 hours ago, Jonathan H. B. Lobl said:

    You are suggesting that I use a form of hypnotic induction to re-enter an illusory state.  I am not inclined to do so.



    Is that because you do not believe in the usefulness of hypnotism?  How do you know it's an illusory state if you don't try to enter it?

    If you refuse to use the tool, how can you gain the knowledge, even if that knowledge proves to be negative?

  9. Sometimes doing "wrong" is the right thing to do, just as doing the "right" thing can often be wrong.


    There are no rights granted to us, not in the natural sense - only through the kindly interventions of your friendly neighborhood politician. They want - they NEED - to exert that control, that power over you, so they make up some new set of "rights" to "grant" you.

    And what is given can be taken away. Thus, power and control.

    If you choose to not play their games - if you "stand against the masses", as Atwater Vitki said is not possible - then you will not be controlled by them. But it takes strength, fortitude and character, traits sadly lacking in much of our society.

  10. Yea well if you think that is bad try going out with Shiva when she has a bad hair day! You do know Kwan Yin started off as a guy originally, don't you :)

    I'm really messed-up then - I thought Shiva was a guy, and I think the moment Kwan Yin crossed over from Hinduism to Taoism he got a sex-change thrown in for free. :)

    ~ Good cheek bones & a sylph-like body, calming influence... go for it! :lol:

    Are you talking about yourself or my goddess?

    Good to see you again, m'Lady!

  11. I have the body of a Goddess -


    She's my main squeeze and we hang out all the time, but she's always getting her dress caught in the door and that darned aura around her head is tough to deal with at the movies.

    And she takes that weird mini-trampoline with us wherever we go ... very embarrassing.

  12. The Lecter Letters

    by “X”

    ...being an account of letters written by Dr. Hannibal Lecter (MD) from 1977 – 2008...


    My name is not important, but what I am about to reveal in these pages is.

    Dr. Hannibal Lecter, perhaps the most well-known and most feared name outside of Jack the Ripper, has been publicized and, indeed, often glorified by his fictionalization in several novels and subsequent motion pictures starring Sir Anthony Hopkins. The terrifying fact that Dr. Lecter actually does exist has, unfortunately, been deemed too powerful a secret to be revealed by the authorities until now.

    I came by these letters in late November, 2008 totally by fortuitous accident. Indulging in my pastime of attending auctions and estate sales of some substance, I tendered the winning bid on what was described in the auction catalog as “miscellaneous papers”, contained within an ornate mahogany box with brass trim. When I later opened this container in my den, I was awestruck – here was positive evidence of Dr. Lecter's existence.

    The idea of writing this expose immediately came to mind, being a writer of some small talent, but I hesitated for several days. The information contained within the 113 letters found in the wooden box was bound to anger a few and stun many. Would I be held responsible for any further mayhem committed by Dr. Lecter? Would I be hunted down and silenced by law-enforcement agents only too willing to do their power-hungry master's bidding? Would I play host to a visit by Dr. Lecter himself, seeking to reclaim that which was rightfully his?

    After torturous nights of decision-making I finally came to the conclusion that I needed to reveal these missives to the world, no matter the personal cost in reputation or blood. I needed to warn you, dear reader, of the possible horrors awaiting you when next you venture out in the world.

    I have not altered the contents of these letters in any way, shape or form. They stand by themselves as mute testament to the workings of a criminally-insane mind, albeit one that is also regarded among his peers and growing base of supporters as containing a large dose of genius.


    December 2008


    Mr. Ronald McDonald

    c/o: McDonald's Corp.

    Dear Mr. McDonald:

    It is with heavy hand that I write this letter, knowing only too well that what has been done, has been done with the purest of intentions. Unfortunately, I cannot in all sincerity allow this matter to escape unpunished.

    I recently had the misfortune to dine in one of your establishments in the Baltimore (Maryland) area. Where I entered your establishment under the impression that I would be receiving, in return for my generous payment, a meal of some substance and quality, I was instead violently attacked by your foodstuffs. Never have I encountered such culinary waste being foisted upon the unknowing public as “food”.

    From the soggy and stale sesame-seed bun to the wilted lettuce, brown tomato pieces and pathetic lump of indigestible gristle you arrogantly call “a hamburger patty”, I was repulsed. Upon gathering the fortitude to actually taste this forlorn “Big Mac” I was given to violent dry heaves and gagging.

    Please do not assume that it was my untrained pallet that was to blame – I have had some small experience in dining, and NEVER have I encountered such utter tripe. In fact, tripe itself would have been a welcome meal after what you offered.

    In future, please do not attempt to pass off such rubbish as real cuisine or I shall be forced to remove your heart and thin-slice it, prior to creating l'amor a neuf.

    Yours in fine dining,

    Dr. Hannibal Lecter, MD

    PS: I now see that your menu has changed to reflect my concerns. Goody!




    Mr. Jonathan Kulwikie


    Plato's Retreat

    NYC, NY

    Dear Mr. Kulwikie:

    Please accept my sincerest apologies for the ruckus I caused on 5 September 1978 at your fine establishment. I have no defense to offer, save that my misunderstanding of your advertisement of “group activities, buffet included” led to what was viewed as my untoward behavior.

    Upon entering your main room and beholding such a writhing mass of flesh, I was simply overcome with gastronomical lust and gave in to the urge to partake of a true buffet.

    Please forward any medical or mortuary bills to me, so that I may promptly remit payment as a small sign of my infinite respect for you and your club.

    Yours in sin,

    Dr. Hannibal Lecter, MD



    Mr. David Berkowitz

    c/o Son of Sam

    Yonkers, NY

    Dear David:

    Please accept my congratulations upon your latest achievements – you are truly an inspired performance artist!

    Having the dog “talk” to you is genius, and I've spent some time of late pondering whether I could utilize such a distraction in my own work. Preliminary experiments with canaries and turtles have proved frustrating, but I hold out some small hope of success.

    If you are ever in the Baltimore area, look me up – I believe we could paint the town red together, and beside that, I miss the good times we shared in the past.

    Your friend,



    LETTER TO DR. SEUSS – 1980

    Dr. Seuss

    c/o Seuss Publishing

    NYC, NY

    Dear Dr. Seuss:

    I'm contacting you in hopes of securing your cooperation in several small matters that are nonetheless of some import to me.

    First, I would like to know about your famous green eggs. How do you make them green? Are they by chance mixed with fresh pancreas – that would lend a greenish hue, would it not? Do tell – I'm fascinated, and would enjoy immensely adding these treats to my table.

    Second, concerning your well-publicized ability to rhyme – I would like to submit my own amateurish efforts to your attention, in hopes of your rating them as to content, technical compliance and saleability.

    My offering:

    One, bite, two bite

    Left bite, right bite

    Night is over, song is sung

    Think I'll dine upon your tongue

    Dressed up in my finest jeans

    Eat your liver with some beans

    Thank you for your time, Doctor (by the way – I would absolutely love to know what your degree is in) - I await your reply with bated breath.

    I remain,

    Yours in prose,

    Hannibal Lecter, MD